The Reverend Al Green

    I usually leave music writing to my dear friend Katie Jackson. Her blog is called TuneMusing and if you love music you should subscribe to her blog -----> here. I was so touched by my first Al Green concert that I found myself having to write about the experience.

Al Green was my entry into what I now know as my love affair with all things soul. I grew up fortunate enough with a lot of good music around me. My mom loved Motown, my Dad loved Jazz and Country music and my sister was all R&B all of the time. It wasn't until the soudtrack of Pulp Fiction that I started paying attention to music. Pulp Fiction was really a two fold sensory overload. First, Tarantino's filmmaking/story telling was on a whole new level. Second, his use of music in that film was well played. The entire soundtrack was gold. Al Green, Dusty Springfield, Kool & The Gang --------> yes please. I played that soundtrack over and over again. On my way to school, in my room, wherever I could find a CD player. Yes, a CD player. It was 1994.

Since then, Al Green has been a daily drug. His music and lyrics reach down deep hitting my heart, soul.....all the way down to my tip toes. My favorite Al Green tune - Love & Happiness. That song is best played on the juke box of a dive bar late at night. The first beats with the  guitar and tapping strike a chord in an empty, dark bar calling to whatever love- past, present or future, you may be holding onto. His lyrics talk about that kinda love that calls you at 2AM (you know the kind) and also the love that comes home early cause they've waited all day to hold you. That song by the Reverend will always be on my top 10 list.

Seeing Al Green in the flesh has been on my music bucket list for a while. My young co-worker was the one to spearhead the purchasing of tickets for the show and little did she know what she was getting into.  When he hit the stage in a full tuxedo, spats and white gloves to boot, I knew this was going to be a sersious music event. Earlier in the day I had texted my young co-hort that I was going to dress up for the evening. I told her I had to dress up for the Reverend, it shows respect. Well, it was a fantastic surprise that he was dressed to the nine's for us, which reflected his respect for his fans.

I know that Al Green lived a pretty hard life early on and it showed during the gig. He's a really young man in the scheme of things (mid 60's), but during the show he was singing his ass off  so hard that he would literally have to pause between songs and take some deep breaths and let us know that some of his classics kick his own ass. He also handed out long stemmed roses to his lady (which also included one dude) fans. It was totally old school and wonderful. He shined that classic big grin a million times and yelled out to the crowd how much he loved us. His band was tight and included his children who are his backup singers. During the entire show it just felt like one big Al Green hug. It was probably the best Al Green experience I could've had.

Al wasn't on stage for a long time, but long enough to give us the hits. At the end of the show it seemed all of us in the crowd rallied for an encore, but I think Al's steam ran out and the lights went up and that was that. There were definitely tears that were shed for Al a few times during his set which again, my poor younger co-hort didn't know what to do with, but hey, music makes me emotional and I guess so does Al Green. So, here's to a little Love and Happiness in all of our worlds and of course more Al Green.

The Fourth Wheel.

  I've found a new title for myself in urban society. You can call it whatever you like. Fag hag, fruitfly, I'm gonna call it what it is - the Gay Man's Wing Woman . The revelation came to me a couple of weeks ago when a friend of mine asked if I wanted to head out with her gay work husband and another gay man as she wanted to play gay match maker and I would be a part of the "double date." At first I didn't understand what she was  really asking, but I'm usually up for anything at least once.

Then came the day that we were all supposed to meet up and hang out. I had to ask her again what we were doing. Were she and I supposed to be on a date too? Am I a beard like Kim Kardashian? I was confused. What it turned into was a very pleasant evening with one of my best friends and two of the most decadently handsome men that I've ever had the pleasure of spending time with. When I say handsome, I mean HANDSOME. We laughed, they bought us ladies drinks and food, we strolled around, indulged in Smitten ice cream and laughed some more. At the end of the evening we hugged it out, said au revoir and hoped that the "date" my friend and I were supervising went well for our handsome gays.

The next day my friend and I were laughing saying that was one of the best dates we'd been on in a long time....except for the obvious. For a moment I felt sorry for myself. Wondering if this is my new "dating" life? Is this the best it's going to get?  And then I came off my "feeling sorry for myself" perch and remembered that I've been a "wing woman" since I was a kid without even realizing it.

When I was in elementary school I had a boy who liked to hang around with me and a couple of my close girlfriends. We loved New Kids On The Block and so did he. We went to their concerts and so did he. We had posters of them on our walls and, you guessed it,  so did he. Troy even had a favorite New Kid and kissed his poster before he went to bed. Us girls thought nothing of it. Fast forward a few years and in High School, I dated a really cute skater boy who seemed a little "Emo" at the time. He was a little dark but nothing I couldn't handle, just thought it was hormones and him not really getting along with his family - the ususal teen angst. He had to abruptly leave our school because of how dark he got and it was a little devastating. I was on a family vacation during Thanksgiving break which, in those times, there was no internet or cell phones and when I returned he was gone. It was years later, thanks to the internet and a little thing called MySpace that I found him. He was in a very happy and committed same sex partnership and I knew that was the reason he had been so sad and dark during high school. I wish he felt comfortable to have told me back then that he liked boys because I totally would of had his back. But attending a conservative, Christian school didn't leave much room for a lot of acceptence or support.

Going back to Troy, we had lost touch since our elementary school days but recently just ran into him on the streets of San Francisco. He's a beautifully handsome gay man in his adult life. Happy, successful and did I mention handsome? I guess when we were kids maybe we should have known he "liked" boys, but what did we know, he just wanted to hang out with the girls and bless our parents for letting him feel normal. I know Troy dated girls in elementary school and high school, but I'm so glad he's been able to grow up and be himself and I have to say, if I were a gay man, I would totally date him. Hello Troy!!!

It seems I've always been drawn to gay men starting at a very young age. My sister had gay friends in the 1980's and with our 20 year age difference all of her friends were adults. I had gay "uncles" without knowing it. They were fabulous and I can't lie, I had crushes on them and wanted to marry someone like them when I grew up. My brother is gay and he would bring his friends to holiday party's but I had no idea, it was just more boys for me to hang with.

As an adult, I've learned that pretty much half of my celebrity adolescent crushes are now out of the closet. I suppose it's not surprising. I've had a thing for gay males since I was a kid and now realize I've been their wing woman for decades. It's a blessing and a curse, especially living and trying to date in the city of San Francisco. There has been a moment or two where there has been confusion about dudes I have gone on dates with. Is he or isn't he.......that IS the question.

No matter really. I look forward to more gay dates and being the designated wing women in the future, especially when you know they're not looking for anything more than good company, gossip and a nice sparkling Rose.

V.D.

Valentines Day. It's the last few hours until that Hallmark holiday. I'm not here to crap on it, I'm here to celebrate it. Music and love hold a very special place in my heart and I thought I'd do a little top 10 playlist of music that warms my soul. It's not in any particular order and you may disagree, but hey, if any of these picks inspire you in some romantic way, I've done my job.

1) Marvin Gaye - After the Dance

2) Isley Brothers - Footsteps in the Dark
3) Santo & Johnny - Sleepwalk
4) Goapele - Play
5) Flamingos - I Only Have Eyes for You
6) Anthony David - Cold Turkey
7) El Debarge - All This Love
8) Michael Jackson - Lady In My Life

9) Bill Withers - Use Me

10) Otis Redding - Cigarettes and Coffee

Bonus picks since I'm celebrating Valentines with these two fellas:

Raphael Saadiq (TTT) - Lay Your Head on My Pillow

Lenny Kravitz - I Belong To You

Happy Valentines Day.

xo